Thursday, July 06, 2006

I'm so vain, I probably think this blog is about me

As did most of America, I spent the 4th at a BBQ. Not long after I arrived, a couple walked in and I immediately noticed the guy. Partly because he was REALLY tall, partly because he was cute in a clean cut sort of way, but mainly because I was pretty sure the girl was married to someone else. Turns out, she's still married to someone else and BBQ guy is just a friend of hers.

Vain moment #1: This "friend" appeared not to be interested in me in the least, and I decided that was weird.

Later, I overheard him talking to some other people and gathered that he was in fact single, which made us the only two unattached schmucks there. Eventually the people he was talking to dispersed, as did the people I was talking to. We were left standing near each other, but neither of us made an immediate move to begin a conversation. He finally decided to try some small talk, and used the corn on the cob as an ice breaker. Interesting choice.

Vain moment #2: The corn I'm eating is completely unworthy of conversation. Aha! He IS interested in me.

After several minutes of chatting, I noticed that we were quite conspicuously being left alone. We were also - less conspicuously - being watched. During our second awkward silence, I excused myself to get a refill. Moments after entering the kitchen, the hostess popped in after me and said, "Okay, so my friend who brought BBQ Guy... she wants to know if you like him. Because he's interested in you, and if you're interested in him, she'll encourage him." Junior high courtship at its finest.

I gave my vote (undecided) and headed back out to rejoin the party. It wasn't too long before I found myself back in conversation with BBQ Guy, Hostess, and Little Miss Matchmaker. Things were going quite nicely, which is presumably what prompted Matchmaker to ask Hostess "Hey, why don't you show me that thing in your room?" leaving me and BBQ Guy alone once again.

That thing in your room? Smooth, girls. Real smooth.

The rest of the evening proceeded in a much more adult fashion. But very shortly after the fireworks, Matchmaker and BBQ Guy began saying their goodbyes.

Vain moment #3: I quickly weighed the pros and cons of giving him my number, which he would surely want.

And then they left. Huh. I guess he didn't want my number. And, I kid you not, I didn't see that coming.

So c'mon, sing it with me: "You're so vain..."

(Though in my defense, this blog IS about me. So does that make me vain, or just accurate?)

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