Tuesday, June 27, 2006

Luke, I'm not your father

Forget what you've seen in episodes I, II, and III. It's bullshit. Darth Vader is not Anakin Skywalker gone bad. Spielberg just made that up to sell tickets. (Editor's Note: You may have noticed I named the wrong director. I noticed too. Please adjust your memories to show Lucas named in the previous statement. Thank you.) Darth Vader has always been Darth Vader. And as a small child - prior to joining the dark side, of course - the young Vader enjoyed the same things any other future evil villain would enjoy: skipping, doing the hokey pokey, and playing team sports.

See? There he is on first base.

Yeah, my kid's got a little pin head. It's amazing he ever managed to hit the ball, cuz he was pretty much swinging blind.

Saturday was the final game of the season. I'm kind of sad it's over. There wasn't a single game that didn't make me laugh so hard I cried (see photo above). We were not the best team. In fact, I'd say we were the worst. (Thank god they don't keep score in T-ball.) Most of the kids on our team were rookies, which probably had something to do with it. At least that's what we liked to tell ourselves.

At the end of the final game, one of the parents led the adults in a cheer to show our appreciation for the coach. At the top of our lungs, we yelled:

One! Two! Three! Four!
Who do we appreciate?
Coach Kerri!!

It sort of fell apart for some of us around "two," when we realized we were doing it wrong. But others of us never even noticed.

We're a bunch of idiots. No wonder our kids suck.

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