Saturday, November 05, 2005

Free at last, free at last

Not so long ago I was (dating? seeing? hanging out with?) a guy we'll call Josh, to protect the innocent. I fell quickly and completely in love. Unfortunately, he was living with his girlfriend when I met him (on December 18th - isn't it weird that I remember the date?). They were engaged a few months later. Now they're married. Lots of tears on my end, but eventually I pulled myself up. Yay me.

For whatever reason, I have this disgusting habit of keeping in touch with - and, dare I say it, remaining friends with - men I've (dated? seen? hung out with?), even the ones I maybe shouldn't. So, "Josh" came by last night to catch up. Have to admit, the first glimpse of the new ring made my breath catch, and I stood there waiting for the well of emotion, promising myself I wouldn't cry. Stood and waited. Waited a little more. And finally realized that particular well of emotion has run dry. Thank god almighty, I'm free at last.

Perhaps now I'll grant him his wish, and meet the girl friend... I mean fiancee... I mean wife. Okay, that idea still makes my stomach roll. Heartache I can get over, but guilt I'm not so good with.

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